Princess Ilana Rostovic
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Real Identity: Princess Ilana Rostovic
Appearances: The Collywobbles, The Tourmaline Necklace, Cheers to the Tin Man, Chasing Squirrels, The Iron Pot, Priyatel Skelet, and A Very Funny Monster
Powers/Skills: Political Administration
Voiced By: Maria Bakalova
Princess Ilana Rostovic is the heir apparent to Pokolistan and was in negotiations with the United States of America for her country's unmined petroleum deposits. In 2022, Amanda Waller of A.R.G.U.S. assigned Rick Flag Sr. to Task Force M to guard Princess Ilana's life after Circe and the Sons of Themyscira violently crossed the border into the country to bring about its downfall. Flag and the Bride looked at the portraits of the royal family and both recognized the gene pool was "above ground and inflatable." To Flag's surprise, Princess Ilana was the opposite - young and beautiful. He bowed to her but the Amethyst Knight Alexi decided to mess with him and lied only the sacred, customary bow was allowed in the castle and they were obligated to kill him. The knights surrounded the task force and armed their gauntlets. Flag claimed he was not briefed on what kind of bow to use. Alexi and the knights broke into laughter. Alexi pointed out Flag was about to mess his pants. Flag denied it repeatedly.
Alexi boasted they were a lot like Americans and cited the Jamie Kennedy Experiment, Super Bowl Shuffle and the "Wazzup" phrase. Dr. Phosphorus sarcastically commended him on his current popular culture references. He then asked Phosphorus, "where's the beef?" Princess Ilana told him that was enough and they proceeded to a banquet prepared for the honored guests. Flag apologized to Ilana for his team's lack of manners at the dinner table because they lived on prison grub. She informed him they didn't stand on ceremony and it was okay to call her just "Ilana." They toasted then she asked if he tried the prison grub. He only saw it but knew it was enough to give him the "collywobbles." Ilana insisted she loved seeing friends enjoying themselves. The queen of Pokolistan was present at the head of the table. It was evident the queen was catatonic in her senior years. Princess Ilana explained she had not been herself for a long time. The queen moaned. Ilana told them the queen was pleased they came then addressed that was why she was handling political affairs even though her ascension to the throne would not be official until the queen died. Ilana told the queen she loved her, too.
In the early evening, Ilana played fetch with Weasel. She told Flag she was happy to have the company. They shared a beer as Weasel dragged one of the musicians playing for them. She asked why Weasel was in prison. Flag revealed he supposedly killed 27 children but pointed out he never showed any violent tendencies since then but advised her not to invite the school choir to the castle. Ilana claimed she loved American music like rock and roll. She admitted her country was a charming one but it was backwards, always rejecting progress as corrupt. She revealed it was her most cherished dream to lead her people into the 21st century. Flag quipped he wasn't sure he could recommend it. She asked him if he was married. Flag revealed he was but his wife ended up being his least favorite aspect of that 21st century. She promised to avoid that part. Flag mused missteps sometimes led a person to where they need to be and revealed they had a son when they were both 18 years old but he grew to become a fine young man and an improvement over him in every way.
Ilana was sorry to hear his son passed about two years ago. Flag believed they would have gotten on well like a house on fire. Ilana didn't think that sounded good. Flag assured her it was a good thing. Ilana then intimated she was into older men and announced she wanted to show him something. They went to her room. She showed off an armoire that was over 500 years old. Flag asked her what she wanted to show him. She quickly undressed. He turned away and told her this was not ethical and he was supposed to protect her. She asked him if he had to protect her from loneliness or lack of passion. She pushed him onto her bed and crawled on top of him. She asked if he could protect her from Pokolistani men who never saw the world, had no clue how to treat a woman, and could not see her as a human being from beyond the veil of royalty. He quickly got off the bed and excused himself. Later that night, Ilana found Flag fighting Dr. Phosphorus in the castle's kitchen over his Nanite Detonation Control.
Princess Ilana took Flag to a bathroom to tend to his wounds. Phosphorus, Weasel, and G.I. stood at the doorway and worried as Flag stared at them while holding the Nanite Detonation Control. Ilana closed the door and inquired about the control. Flag explained a button on it could activate an unbearably painful jolt directly into their brains. She thought it cruel. Flag admitted that was the point. She told him to take his shirt off in order to clean his wounds. As she wiped his wounds, she asked if he controlled his team with the remote. Flag admitted he did hypothetically. Ilana understood why Phosphorus tried to steal it. He promised to get them under control and keep her safe. She found him to be a kind man, which was rare in Pokolistan. Ilana finished bandaging Flag's wrist and asked about the origin of a wound. Flag resisted at first but told her he was stabbed in the Persian Gulf. She asked about another and traced it with her finger. He repeated to her it was unethical for them to fool around. She reminded him she was going to the queen soon and she got what she wanted. She kissed him and they had sex.
The next day, Circe and the Sons of Themyscira attacked the castle. Princess Ilana was stirred out her sleep by one of the Amethyst Knights. He apologized for being rough but needed to get her to safety. He was shot in the head by one of the Sons. Ilana fled from the Sons down the eastern hall and was grabbed by a large Son. He put her over his shoulder and slapped her butt then asked what they were supposed to do with her. A doofus Son reminded him Circe ordered them to kill her. The large Son wanted to have some fun first. Ilana raked his face then ran back to her bedroom. Ilana applied the deadbolt and locked her door. Ilana ran to the safe in her armoire and removed an antique pistol. The Sons broke in. The doofus Son grabbed her head but she shoved the pistol into his mouth and fired. She ran for the window but the large Son chased her. She turned and shot him in the center of the chest. He realized he was dead and fell over. Circe blasted the window and Ilana was thrown.
Circe floated in and used telekinesis to throw Ilana into her armoire. Ilana begged her to stop and in exchange she would give her whatever she wanted. Circe revealed she wanted her dead. Weasel suddenly ran into the room and tackled her out of the castle. Flag and Ilana kissed. She asked if would be coming back to see her but Flag only talked about having to bring Circe back to the U.S. to find out why she tried to kill her. Ilana suggested it would be better to just execute her. He chuckled when she said "bong" instead of "bang" but she insisted it didn't sound like the latter. Flag insisted that wasn't how they did things in America. She quipped the Internet said otherwise. Flag clarified it's not how America should do things. She conceded he was a good man and she had feelings for him. He told her had to go and left. She dispatched Sergei, one of her knights, to spy on A.R.G.U.S. at Belle Reve Correctional Center. He saw Dr. MacPherson, a leading expert on Themsycira. In fear of Circe flipping Amanda Waller, she hired Clayface to take MacPherson's place and discredit her.
Circe revealed to Amanda Waller that killing Princess Ilana would have saved the world. Waller decided to allow Circe to share her vision with her. Waller saw an apocalyptic vision of Princess Ilana, with scars on her face, clad in armor addressing her Amethyst Knights while having an armored gorilla at her side. Metropolis was bombed, civilians were massacred, and various heroes and vigilantes were impaled on stakes. Waller fell to her knees and panted in shock. Tears flowed down Circe's face. Waller returned to the monitor room and didn't know what to think. Flag naturally didn't believe any of it. Waller brought in Dr. Aisla MacPherson, the world's leading scholar on Themyscira, to consult then decided to assign the Creature Commandos to return to Pokolistan and kill Ilana. Flag refused to go along with it so the Bride was chosen as team leader and they were dispatched.
The next day, Princess Ilana overheard Flag's voice on the phone in the dining hall and pushed the butler away. Flag advised her to flee the castle and warned her the Creature Commandos were on their way to kill her. An ambush was set up. One of the Amethyst Knights, Sergei, reported the Commandos escaped but believed they would not be much danger out there on their own. Ilana found it tragic they were being misled by their own government but concluded they had no choice and ordered Sergei to find them and kill them all. Sergei thought the Commandos were friends. Princess Ilana explained they were being misled by Circe and were on their way to assassinate her. Sergei wanted to get her to the bunker but she refused to hide. She repeated her orders to find them and kill them if they had to, for the sake of Pokolistan and its people. By sunrise, the Amethyst Knights gathered and lined up in Poko Castle as Princess Ilana presided over them from a balcony.
Princess Ilana prepared for her usual morning swim in the garden's pond despite Sergei's concerns. She noted the Knights were surrounding the perimeter and keeping her safe so she could continue to be an example for her people. Sergei pointed out only her soldiers were present. Weasel saw Ilana and became animated. Mazursky held him down, realizing she was excited to see Ilana because she played fetch with him during their previous visit. They narrowly avoided detection. Bride believed the only way to get to Ilana was underwater. Mazursky refused to do it but she relented and took one of Bride's blades. Mazursky sneaked into the pond and prepared to stab Ilana while she was performing a backstroke. Weasel ran into the pond and got her attention. Ilana noticed Mazursky and dodged her thrust. They struggled underwater. Mazursky lost the blade. Ilana grabbed it and fatally stabbed her in the gut several times. Bride walked into the pond and was shocked to see Mazursky's body float up to the surface. The Knights surrounded the Commandos. Sergei ordered them to halt and arrived with Waller on the line. Waller told Bride she made a mistake. Ilana rose up through the blood and walked out of the pond emotionless.
Bride found Ilana walking down the hall to her study. Bride followed her inside. Ilana told her she understood Bride was following orders and didn't hold it against her. She speculated Circe framed her in a bid to destroy the world. Bride looked at the books on her shelves and disagreed. Bride openly stated she believed Circe was telling the truth about her. Ilana thought she was funny and opened the drawer she kept her pistol in. Bride revealed she saw Clayface on the tapes. Ilana's smile disappeared. Bride figured out she seduced Flag to get him on her side, then after they captured Circe she suggested killing her right away which would have taken care of everything but Flag refused so she sent Sergei to spy on them in America. She presumed he saw Dr. MacPherson, the preeminent expert on Themyscira, and since she would back up whatever Circe said, Ilana hired Clayface to impersonate and discredit MacPherson so Waller would have second thoughts and call off the hit. Ilana called her theory nonsense.
Bride called her a power mad, sadistic, narcissistic Disney princess who wanted to destroy the world. Ilana glanced at her pistol. Bride clarified that rather than to save the world, she was going to kill her because she took the life of the only friend she had. Ilana grabbed the pistol but Bride shot her in the forehead first.