Sons of Themyscira
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Real Identity: Various
Appearances: The Collywobbles, The Tourmaline Necklace, and Cheers to the Tin Man
Powers/Skills: Military Warfare
Voiced By: Alan Tudyk (Surfer Son/Tanner), Tony Cavalero (Incel Son), Julian Kostov, Piotr Michael, Paul Ben-Victor (Large Son), and Joe Zieja (Doofus Son)
The Sons of Themyscira are a batallion of right-wing men working at the behest of the rogue Amazoninan and reputed sorceress Circe. Circe promised the Sons that once the downfall of Pokolistan was achieved, she would lead them to conquer Themyscira. GBS News was able to record footage of them attacking a gas station and took comments from two members. Tanner, a surfer-type, commented Themyscira was the sickest place ever but sexist because only women lived there. An incel-type put out a question to all "woke feminists" asking why only girls got cool waterfalls like the ones reputed to be on Themyscira. He believed the rights of men were being denigrated all over the world. Rick Flag Sr. thought they were clowns but Amanda Waller believed they were dangerous clowns that threatened the United States of America's interests in Pokolistan, namely its unmined petroleum deposits. She tasked Flag with protecting Princess Ilana Rostovic, the heir apparent to Pokolistan, with a new task force composed of prisoners from Belle Reve Correctional Center's secret Non-Human Internment Division.
A convoy transported Task Force M from Pokolistan's airport to Poko Castle. Two Sons parked in an alley observed the convoy. Tanner reported back to the others that Rostovic "imported" security. Later that evening, Tanner spied on Nina Mazursky and the Bride of Frankenstein entering Frankenstein Manor and informed another Son over his walkie talkie. Circe overheard the conversation and ordered him to get the address. She ate then used telekinesis to levitate her drink then crushed it after she was done to the amazement of the Sons. As Circe attacked Mazursky and Bride, the Sons of Themyscira made their way to them on foot. Bride threw a chest at the first one then stomped the floor. She and Mazursky fell down a floor and took off. A lone Son told them to stop but Bride backhanded him into a wall. Four more came around a corner and opened fire. The Bride grabbed an impromptu shield and waited until they ran out of ammunition then sent them through a wall. She dispatched them one by one. The last one tried to punch her but it did nothing to her. She sent him through the roof, sailing past Circe.
Bride outran Circe's blasts and jumped through a window and used one of the Sons as a landing pad. She took his gun and mowed down the rest of the Sons present. Mazursky contacted Flag but she ran into more Sons and was chased back towards the manor. Tanner fired a shot and it shattered her helmet. One of the other Sons used the butt of his gun to knock Bride out after Circe pushed her off a balcony. Circe and the Sons immobilized them then left for the undefended castle. The Sons battled the Amethyst Knights. A Knight trying to take Princess Ilana to safety was shot in the head by one of the Sons. Ilana fled from the Sons down the eastern hall and was grabbed by a large Son. He put her over his shoulder and slapped her butt then asked what they were supposed to do with her. A doofus Son reminded him Circe ordered them to kill her. The large Son wanted to have some fun first.
Ilana raked his face then ran back to her bedroom. The doofus Son noted he needed medical attention. The large Son angrily told him to go after the princess. Ilana applied the deadbolt and locked her door. The Amethyst Knights and Sons battled across the castle grounds. One of the Sons got out a grenade but Alexi sideswiped him with his transport and he blew up. Alexi and the Commandos joined the battle. A Son opened fire on Phosphorus but he effortlessly disintegrated the bullets then shoved his arm through the Son's gut and immolated him, calling him a shish kabab. An Amethyst Knight gave Mazursky her spare air suit but he was shot in the head. G.I. Robot asked Flag if the Sons were Nazis. Flag got an idea and told G.I. those were Nazis. G.I. Robot opened fire on the Sons. His upper half levitated into the air then each arm produced three guns each and he mowed the Sons down but he was blown to pieces by Circe. Ilana ran to the safe in her armoire and removed an antique pistol. The Sons broke in. The doofus Son grabbed her head but she shoved the pistol into his mouth and fired. She ran for the window but the large Son chased her. She turned and shot him in the center of the chest. He realized he was dead and fell over. Circe was defeated by Weasel and Dr. Phosphorus soon after.