Quotes
Deleted Scenes and Lines from Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker The Official Screenplay
Chucko (surprised cry)
Batman lands atop the machinery the Jokerz were moving and glares threateningly at the other Jokerz.
Woof (animal shriek)
The savage creature catches Batman from behind, carrying him off the machinery and knocking him hard onto the floor.
Batman (impact grunt)
Woof (shrieks, giggles)
As Woof rakes Batman with his claws, Ghoul catches Batman around the neck with Woof's leash and starts to pull. Batman grabs the bizarre-looking collar and struggles to pull it away from his neck.
Batman (straining gasps)
ON LOADING BAY DOORS
A vast, circular door set into the floor of the building. It slides open in a circular manner like a camera lens, allowing the two loaders to descend with the machinery. We see a flatbed transport waiting far below to receive the object.
ON THE DEEDS
The girls split-up, one girl jumping onto Bonk's lifter, the other girl onto Chucko's, as the lifters start for the door.
BACK TO BATMAN
Batman flips Ghoul over his head, sending him colliding into Woof.
Ghoul/Woof (grunts, snarls)
Batman tears off the leash, jumps to his feet, and runs after the lifters, now swiftly lowering the machinery down through the door.
ON GHOUL AND WOOF
Now ignored by Batman, they leap through the window that the hero smashed in earlier.
Woof (wild laugh).
Dee-Dee #1
Incoming!
ON DEE-DEE #1
She tumbles across the top of the machinery and her sister catches her as she reaches Chucko's lifter.
Dee-Dee #2
Gotcha, Sis!
BACK TO BATMAN
Batman lands on the spot vacated by Dee-Dee #1.
Bonk whirls to glare at him.
Bonk
You got a death wish, Bats!
Batman
And here I thought I was just being a good citizen.
Bonk detaches the arms from the machinery and veers the lifter away.
ON CHUCKO AND THE DEEDS
Now holding the machinery by itself, Chucko's lifter severely dips and strains under the weight. The Deeds barely manage to hold on.
Dee-Dee #1 & #2 (screams)
Chucko
Bonk! You moron! Get back here!
ON BONK'S LIFTER
Oblivious to the fact that his lifter is now flying wild, Bonk leaps at Batman.
Bonk (enraged cry)
They go slugging. The lifter streaks down in a wide, circular trajectory. It careens off the sides of buildings, smashes windows, etc.
CHUCKO'S LIFTER
Chucko has straightened out his lifter when he and the Deeds look up to see Batman's lifter headed right for them.
Chucko/Dee-Dee #1 & #2 (scared screams)
They drop the machinery and quickly veer away to keep from being hit.
ON FLATBED
Ghoul and Woof are just running up to the transport when they see the machinery falling toward them.
Ghoul (startling cry)
Woof (scared yelp)
They run for cover as the machine smashes onto the transport, breaking both it and machine itself. The transport starts to spark and smoke
ON GHOUL
He quickly rummages through the wreckage of the machinery and pulls out a small computer guidance board, the electronic memory of the object.
Ghoul looks up to see Batman gliding down and tosses a smiley-faced grenade at him. Batman dives out of the way but the grenade explodes in mid-air, knocking him back.
Batman (startled cry)
ON CHUCKO:
He brings his lifter down close to street level near the wrecked machine, and yells to Ghoul:
Chucko
Move it!
Ghoul scrambles in, followed by Woof. The lifter takes off, CAMERA FOLLOWING, as it sweeps up to where Bonk is still hanging off a flagpole. As it passes beneath, Bonk drops off, causing the lifter to list, but it still stays airborne.
ON BATMAN
He rises from where he's fallen and looks to see the Jokerz are long gone. The sparking transport behind him burts into flame and Batman quickly leaps away just before it explodes. Batman shakes his head.
It streaks through the night sky, headed across a wooded area toward Wayne Manor. The craft dips down through the trees, headed for a stand of tall, thick pines. At the last second the trees swivel away in separate directions, revealing a stone door, which rises up into the sheer rock wall behind it. The instant the Batmobile flies through, the stone door slides back down as the trees' base swivels back into place.
(heard faintly in the background)
Bruce Wayne is certainly no stranger to challenges. Orphaned at age nine, he later assumed control of his father's pharmaceutical company, diversifying it into the areas of computer science and industrial research, making the young Wayne a billionaire many times over. Though Jordan Pryce's concerns have given rise to some doubts among shareholders, the market jumped today with news of Wayne's return. Shares in Wayne Industries stock were trading briskly this afternoon and had risen five points by the final bet.
Wayne will assume the reigns of the company later this week in a special ceremony at the weekly constructed Wayne Enterprises complex, a state-of-the-art office and science center.
The TV shows an image of the futuristic new center. Terry nods with approval.
Terry
Nice.
Bruce
Even though I don't get around as much as I like, I can still help the city in some small ways.
Terry
There's nothing small about that. It must have cost a billion.
Bruce
Three.
Terry
Sure hope I'm in your will.
Bruce gives Terry a friendly pat on the shoulder.
Bruce
Takin' it with me, kid.
Bruce moves off as Terry shakes his head.
Terry
Figures.
Rank amateur kids.
Woofie-baby?
Woof just grins and licks the Joker's face.
Woof
Slurp!
Joker
Awww.
Deeds, be a lamb and sweep out the trash. There's a good girls.
Dee-Dee #1 and Dee-Dee #2 pull Bonk's body off the table and start to haul it away. The Joker shrugs with mock regret.
Part of me hated to do that. A very small part.
Woof (friendly panting)
Joker
Nice doggy.
There he is!
Terry becomes aware of a pair of attractive twenty-something women standing nearby.
Woman #1
He's adorable.
Woman #2
So handsome.
Terry smiles, then suddenly realizes the women aren't referring to him, but to the just entering and elegantly attired Bruce Wayne. Bruce gives the women a polite nod.
Bruce
Ladies.
The women beam with delight at being noticed. Terry moves off with Bruce.
Terry
Gotta be the money.
Bruce
Right.
Thank you, Ms. Carr.
Joker
Oof!
Sic 'im.
I screwed up.
You've never had to look into the eyes of a girlfriend's father and know all he's seeing is "the bad kid." To know that despite whatever I accomplish in school, I'll always be the guy who "did time."
An elevator door opens and Bruce enters the terrace area where the Joker-disrupted reception was held the night before. The place is still pretty much in shambles-broken glass and overturned tables everywhere.
Pryce (Offscreen)
Clear that garbage away.
Bruce looks to see:
ANGLE ON JORDAN PRYCE
The executive is supervising a team of uniformed CLEANUP WORKERS.
Pryce
And sweep that glass up.
Worker
Yes, sir.
Pryce sees Bruce and walks over to him.
Pryce
Well, Bruce. Looks like your return party brought out the lunatic fringe in full force.
Bruce
They weren't on my guest list.
Pryce
No, of course not. Terrible that our company should be a target for such a thing. Don't know how I'll explain it to our shareholders.
Pryce starts off for his office, with Bruce following.
Bruce
Sorry I missed you at the party.
Pryce turns at his door.
Pryce
It was your night. I didn't want to be in the way.
Pryce starts to go in but Bruce gently holds the door open with his cane.
Bruce
Jordan, I know you're not happy with my return.
Pryce
Please. I'm not paid to have an opinion on the matter. You are the head of his corporation and I will strive to do my best for the company, as would any other employee. Hmm...
Pryce pauses, considering something he hadn't thought of before.
Bruce
Something wrong?
Pryce
No. I just noticed you're alone today. Usually you have Terry her to assist you.
Bruce is intrigued by this.
Bruce
I'm surprised someone in your position would remember the name of a boy he'd seen maybe once before.
Pryce
There is a pause, then Pryce sweeps his hand toward his office, gesturing Bruce to come inside. Pryce moves to his inner office bar and pours himself a drink.
Pryce
I got to my position by being thorough, Bruce. Besides, I've made it a point to know everything there is to know about the man I work for.
Pryce takes his drink and sits down opposite Bruce as he recounts Bruce's life story.
Pryce
Orphaned at age nine and educated abroad. Returned to Gotham fifteen years later, but for over two decades only took a passing interest in day-to-day operations. Seems you developed somewhat of a playboy reputation, late hours, nightly carousing, according to the rumors.
Bruce
The foolishness of youth.
Pryce
Still, during that time, you charitably served as legal guardian for two orphaned boys. And later were publicly linked to now-Police Commissioner Barbara Gordon, though you never married.
Bruce
Hardly the stuff of legends.
Pryce toasts Bruce with his glass.
Pryce
Maybe not. But like I said, I am thorough.
Pryce's phone BEEPS.
Secretary (Voiceover)
Mr. Pryce? Your lunch appointment is waiting.
Pryce
On my way. (to Bruce) You'll be okay here on your own?
Bruce
You would know.
Pryce smiles as he exits.
Pryce
I would.
Bruce watches him with suspicion.
DISSOLVE TO
EXTERIOR: COUNTRY ROAD-LATE AFTERNOON
Though not yet night, it is gray and dark, a light rain is falling. We see Bruce's car driving along this lonely country road on the outskirts of the city. PULL BACK to show Terry watching from cover of the woods. He's on his motorcycle. After Bruce's limousine passes, Terry lowers the visor of his helmet and follows.
INTERIOR: LIMOUSINE
As Bruce drives, he talks to someone next to him.
Bruce
I'm standing by my decision. I was a fool to allow McGinnis to assume the role of Batman. It's no life for anyone and you can quote me.
We now see Bruce is talking to Ace, who cocks his head quizzically at Bruce.
EXTERIOR: LIMOUSINE
It heads up a neglected road and passes through open, rusted iron gates. Atop a nearby hill we can see the abandoned, but still recognizable structure which once was Arkham Asylum.
CLOSER ON ARKHAM
The limousine slows to a stop. Bruce climbs out of the driver's side.
Bruce (to Ace)
Stay.
Bruce closes the door and starts to walk toward the entrance.
INTERIOR: ARKHAM
The main door swings open and the bent silhouetted form of Bruce stands framed in the entrance. He slowly walks in.
EXTERIOR: ARKHAM
Terry rides up on his bike and parks it around the corner out of sight of Bruce's car. Terry removes his helmet and starts toward the entrance. He passes Bruce's limousine and Ace barks, tail wagging, happy to see him.
Ace (SFX) (muffled bark)
Terry waves to the dog, but gestures for him to be quiet.
Terry
Shhh. Yeah, I'm happy to see you, too.
Terry heads toward the asylum entrance.
INTERIOR: ARKHAM
Bruce slowly walks through the asylum, passing dark, abandoned cells. Readable names can still be seen next to some of the cells: "Dent, H." next to a cell where half the padding has been torn off the walls; "Isley, P." beside a cell with a scattering of long dead leaves on its floor; "Nygma, E." next to a cell whose walls have been covered with faded, crudely scrawled question marks.
Bruce shakes his head and continues on. So many bad memories.
ANGLE ON TERRY
He quietly ducks through Arkham, following Bruce's trail.
ON BRUCE.
He continues on past where a sawhorse barrier has been erected by a demolished portion of the inner asylum. There are DANGER signs posted around the area and the sound of rushing water can be head rising up from far below. Bruce comes to a pair of imposing double doors. The words OPERATING THEATER can still be read on them. Bruce grimly sets his jaw, pushes the doors open and walks inside.
ON TERRY
Looking around a wall behind Bruce, he watches him enter the room.
INTERIOR: OPERATING THEATER
Bruce walks in, his eyes blinking in the dim light. His gaze falls over a row of Frankenstein-like operating tables and electronic machines, all rusting and falling apart. Then his eye is attracted upward, to a dim form seen swinging in a pool of light. Bruce's eyes go wide with shock.
Bruce (frightened gasp)
INTERIOR: HALLWAY-ON TERRY
He ducks back out of sight, as the doors to the operating theater slam open. Bruce hurries out of the room, a haunted look on his face.
Terry waits until Bruce is gone, looking after the old man with concern. Terry then approaches the operating theater and goes in.
INTERIOR: OPERATING THEATER
Terry enters the operating room and looks around. He looks up to see what Bruce saw, suspended in the dim glow of a broken skylight. It is an obviously fake, stitched-up and crudely made Joker dummy swinging from a rope. Painted across its body are the chilling words: I KNOW. The beeping of a pocket pager alerts Terry. He takes it out and glances at it.
Terry
Dana.
Please excuse my evil twin, here. I can't take her any place.
Dee-Dee #2
She's the bad one.
Don't run away.
Dee-Dee #1
All the boys love us.
Dee-Dee #1 & #2 (in unison)
We're trouble on the double.
Woof (savage growl)
Terry
Oof!
Woof keeps clear and circles for another attack. Terry instinctively flicks his wrist, as if trying to produce a Batarang, then remembers he's not in costume-dope! Woof lunges again.
Woof (attack growl)
Terry kicks the splicer away, but then is roughly yanked to his feet by Chucko. The punk grins as he tells Terry:
ON CHELSEA
She darts forward to pull the dazed Dana out of the line of fire. She shakes her a little, but Dana is out cold.
Chelsea
Dana? Dana!
Chelsea pulls Dana toward the exit.
Chelsea
Hang on!
He pops his snarling head over the bar and threatens Terry.
Woof (snarls)
Terry grabs a bottle and splinters it over Woof's head. The splicer SHRIEKS and withdraws.
Woof (cowardly shriek)
ON GHOUL
He has leapt over the bar and is aiming his laser weapon at Terry. Grabbing wildly, Terry picks up the first thing close at hand, which happens to be the hand-held soda dispenser. He fires it at Ghoul, hitting the hand he was about to fire with. The liquid causes the weapon to SPARK in Ghoul's hand, giving him a big shock.
Ghoul (shocked cry)
Terry kicks Ghoul back over the bar-
Ghoul (impact grunt)
-but the Deeds and Chucko are still firing at him. Terry looks at the giant slushie dispenser and gets an idea. He rams into the dispenser a few times, trying to knock it over.
Maybe he's thirsty.
Dee-Dee #1 (gasps)
She tugs at her sister's arm and points. Dee-Dee #2 turns to see:
WIDER ON DANCE FLOOR
The spilled slushie liquid is headed for the generator, which provides power to the club's lighting effects and music. The liquid hits the generator, which sparks and explodes in a bright flash. Nearby decorations are set on fire as the neon lights in the club overload and explode.
ON THE JOKERZ
They are startled by the explosions.
Dee-Dee #1 & #2 (frightened cries)
The club is plunged into darkness, though smaller explosions and bursts of fire highlight the Jokerz as they run for the back door
Chucko
Bail!
ON TERRY
He vaults over the bar and runs for the front door.
EXTERIOR: CLUB
A few cop cars are pulling up.
Terry
Come on...
Houseboy.
Pryce continues on the TV.
Pryce
I will be filling in for Mr. Wayne during what will unfortunately be an extended convalescence.
Now just hold still and this won't hurt a bit.
The hoods lunge at Robin and start to beat on him.
Robin (offscreen)
(grunts)
Harley
Oops. Lied.
Robin returns the blows in kind, pummeling the hoods.
Hood #1/Hood #2
(impact grunts)
Harley winds up for another blow with the mallet, but Robin pulls it out of her hands with such force that he sends her spinning back into a row of trash cans.
Harley (impact cry)
Ahh!
The place has been trashed, tables overturned, glasses shattered, the Penguin's hired goons beaten unconscious on the floor. Pan past Batgirl knocking out the last goon to PENGUIN, with a black eye and roughed up, frantically shaking his head as Batman prepares to pummel him.
It becomes clear Penguin knows nothing. Batman tosses him aside and strides forward, the black of his cape.
Yeah, you're mother of the freakin' year.
Bruce-Batman-forbade Tim to be Robin again. He blamed himself for what happened and swore he'd never endanger another young partner. Tim felt he had earned the right to make that choice for himself.
Terry
I can relate.
You can turn off the camo mode.
I figured you might.
Look, it's been over thirty years.
Bruce scowls slowly.
Bruce
Remind me to fire him.
Over the past few weeks my Jokerz have stolen the parts I needed to override and control the gizmo. The only thing missing was the communications code, and Timmy kindly provided that.
On the small screen we see the Joker reach for his jar of Jolly Jack jelly beans. He eats one.
Joker
The yacht was just a test shot. I have something special planned for dear old Gotham.
Once you get of there, you're welcome to try and stop us, but I'm not taking bets on that happening any time soon. Toodles.
McGinnis!
INTERIOR: BATCAVE
Bruce watches the scene through Batman's eye lenses.
Bruce
Take out the laser system!
It's like they know what I'm going to do before I think of it!
Getting an idea, Batman throws two Batarangs not at the lasers, but into opposite walls. Both weapons explode, one of them exposing a laser's wiring system.
Batman tosses a grenade into the wiring system. It blows out the wall and all the circuitry controlling both the lasers firing at Batman and the ones shielding the doors and windows.
EXTERIOR: LAB-NIGHT
Batman smashes up through the lab ceiling window and lands on the roof. He speaks to Bruce via his headset.
Batman
My only way out was to do the opposite of what Joker expected Batman to do.
Bruce
Watch yourself. The Joker is also likely to do the opposite of what anyone's expecting.
Batman touches a control on his belt and the Batmobile dives into view.
Joker!
Do-it-yourself demolition derby! I love it!
Batman swerves the Batmobile out of the path of an exploding fuel truck.
That's not possible.
Joker
Anything's possible for me, dope. Old man Wayne should have told you that.
Of course, it took a few decades to rewrite his cellular makeup, but it was only a matter of time before I popped up again.
Gone in a flash before Brucie can stagger to safety or mount a rescue.
Joker
No!
He pulls his hands up and quickly tosses the buzzer onto the floor, but the damage has been done.
The laser beam has cut through the abandoned buildings nearby and is continuing on toward the factory.
INTERIOR: FACTORY
The beaten Jokerz come to in the factory's main area and see the glow from outside and the laser beam headed their way.
Dee-Dee #1
Look!
Ghoul
It's coming this way!
Dee-Dee #2
Run for it!
Dee-Dee, Wolf and Ghoul dash out of the factory and into the arms of Gordon and the arriving cops.
Gordon
Hands up!
The unarmed Jokerz surrender without protest. Woof slumps in defeat, his fearsome attitude gone.
Woof (human voice)
Aw, nuts.
I've never had any complaints before.
Batman
Or laughs either.
Gordon and her men have cordoned off the factory, but there's little they can do about the approaching laser, now starting to move steadily toward the factory. They look up as they see bits of the upper factory blown away by the Joker's grenades.